so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I just made out with a guy for $7.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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