so explain again why im purple
no
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Randomize
