no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
