He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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