She's JV to your varsity
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
