If that was your dad, he is hot
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
