This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
