just come out here and I will go home with you...
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Randomize
