Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
MIDGETS
????
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
