How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
