took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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