and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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