Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
