I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
