I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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