do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize