I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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