I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
