I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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