Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
