Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
i want to swaddle you in tequila
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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