you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
