Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
