well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
we're making bets on your personal life
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
