And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
