Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
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