I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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