Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
