Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize
