I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
