He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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