Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
