The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I came so hard my ears popped.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
