Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
