I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I want to be your penis for a week.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Dicks are not precious.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize