we're making bets on your personal life
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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