My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Randomize
