goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
