So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Randomize
