you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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