The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
