I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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