i wish peter jackson would direct porn
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize