you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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