Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
birth control should be required to get into college
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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