i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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