I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
