Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
