I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Randomize