Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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