remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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